Joe Montana Will Speak from the Mountaintop

Getcher tickets now, ’cause by the time Joe Montana takes the stage at Cal State East Bay’s Hayward Economic Summit on April 10, they’ll be all snatched up. Yes, the 49ers quarterback, who has apparently been making a killing in venture capital and real estate, will lecture attendees on sound business practices, not the West Coast offense. Maybe he’ll give a talk on how to blow all your savings on Mexican telecommunications ventures, and be forced to write tell-all books about shooting steroids into your colleagues’ derriere? Oh wait, that’s Jose Canseco. Never mind.