Maybe They Can Use the Gluey Gravy as Reinforcement

Declaring, “Highway construction is hungry work,” an IKEA ad in yesterday’s Chron sought to entice road jockeys working on I-580 flyover repairs with the promise of Swedish meatballs. Under a pyramidal plate of craggy-looking kottbular (said meatballs), the text reads: “At IKEA Emeryville, we’re flabbergasted by how fast the mess in the maze has been fixed up. To show our appreciation, we’re inviting all employees of Caltrans and C.C. Myers to come have a meal on us. Don’t worry, we’re making your favorite – Swedish meatballs.” Small-point-size legalese says the offer’s good for a fifteen-meatball serving, regularly $4.99. “Some products require assembly,” it explains, “but not the meatballs. We’ll make those for you.”

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