4:01 p.m. Any Weekday: Best Place to Hate Your Parents

Todos Santos Park, Concord

When you’re frustrated, sullen, and forty in suburbia, you’re the face of the modern American spiritual crisis. When you’re frustrated, sullen, and seventeen, you’re just a teenager. But even the gangly Grendels of Concord gotta have a place to hang their berets, and while the new skate park is nice and all, its disconcerting proximity to the police station and official designation as the city’s “youth zone” give it a creepy Bantustan feel. That’s why we recommend the Todos Santos Park, located in lovely downtown Concord, as the place to get away from the glee club and get used to the taste of American Spirits in the back of your throat. But be warned, the cops are ever-vigilant, and you’ll need to learn a few survival skills if you’re going to hang out unmolested by the Man. Avoid assembling in groups of four or more. Don’t wear the same colors, as Concord’s got a serious case of gangphobia. And lastly, wait. Time is on your side. Before you know it, you’ll be eighteen, and your parents will throw you out of the house.

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