(SCENE: The ramshackle Oakland front office’s conference room. Oakland scouts fidget nervously, staring at their own pagers rather than each other. Billy Beane bursts into the conference room waving a printout.)
Billy Beane: Guys, you’re still trying to replace Gio Gonzalez. I told you we can’t do it. We can’t do it. Now what we might be able to do is recreate him, in the field of social media.
Grady Fuson: The field of what?
Billy Beane: No one is talking about this team as contenders, but the real problem is no one is talking about this team, at all. We haven’t been a trending topic since Dallas Braden’s perfect game.
Ron Hopkins: What’s a Trending topic?
Billy Beane: Peter, get Wikipedia open for Ron. Gonzalez has 19,586 followers on Twitter. Andrew Bailey has 11,835 followers. Trevor Cahill is not on Twitter, but his Facebook fan page has 2,128 likes. What’s the total?
(He snaps his finger and points to Peter)
Peter Brand: Do you want me to speak?
Billy Beane: When I point to you, yeah. Why couldn’t Milton Bradley have been like you?
